Autograf Grill – Honey Pork Ribs

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My grandmother always taught us to finish our meals. Everything on our plate. Absolutely everything. No matter how disgusting or repulsive it was. I’ve lived by this code since then, and very rarely do I leave anything (unless there’s brussel sprouts, but those things are evil).

Every restaurant I go, no matter how large and absurd the amount of food served is, it all gets swallowed. Most places are no match for my unfatigable hunger. And I lived in the US for a while, where they sure know their way around massive disgusting meals. Always lived by my motto, “No food gets left behind”.

And just recently I found my new nemesis: this Polish restaurant called Autograf Grill in Haringey. Nothing could have prepared me for the utter humiliation I felt after leaving this place, with leftovers for half my dish in a polystyrene container. Yes, half. This thing I ordered, the Honey Pork Ribs, were not even that big, but they packed a punch. One taste and I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but I couldn’t have foreseen how impossible it would be to finish the whole thing.

It's like a small army of food just looking at me. Autograf Grill - Honey Pork Ribs Polish food

It’s like a small army of food just looking at me

Served with dried fruits and some incredible cabbage (plus pan fried potatoes in my case), it’s some of the juiciest cuts of meat I’ve ever had, and so intensely flavorsome that my mind wanted to keep up the experience and keep on eating. But my tummy kept holding back. It was too much, too sweet, too fast.

And thus I asked for the check. And the beautiful and quite possibly Polish waitress came back with the check and… with all I left from my meal. Which was enough to have a delicious Polish dinner that very same day. So yeah, I still have nightmares for not finishing it all, but I guess I’ll have to come back and win Round 2 of the fight.

Slimy? This massive pork beast was covered in honey and fruits and spices and… OF COURSE IT WAS SLIMY
Satisfying? Fantastic. So Fantastic, in fact, that I almost did not feel bad for taking half of it home, if only because It meant I would have the same sensations later that day

 

Autograf Grill
499 Green Lanes, London, Greater London, N4 1AL
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